For the ladies Contrary to popular opinion, college can, at times, be very frustrating in the carnal sense. If you're of the sort who isn't creeped out by orgasms, buy a vibrator. They're cute. They're hip. They cost less than 20$, unless you get one of the fancy twisting pearl toned ones. Even better, wait until you start school so you can charge it to your own account (Nothing better than your parents asking, "Honey? What did you buy from Toys in Babeland?" after they get their credit card bill).

You may be asking, "But Xue, what else could I do with a vibrator?" The possibilites are endless. For one, name it. Make little clothes for it. Display it (some of them look like out of this world modern art, for serious). Give better back massages. Tenderize a veal escalope. And look at it this way: Having all your newfound buddies in the dorm stealing it and chasing each other around with it is a great bonding activity. Truly, an investment that pays for itself in happiness.

(And if you're not into other people touching your sex toys, they also make little hide-away pillows for you to safetly and covertly store your cache.)

((I bet you could hide an 8th in those pillows as well.))  ¶ 7:20 AM